12.16.05 - 2:45 p.m.

School's out and I've started to ease back into sleeping, even though my bed is scattered with 4 piles of cards. Each sits on its own puffy blanket hill.

I've been looking at the cards basking in the light my room receives for being so close to the sun for a couple afternoons now. They don't tell me anything. When I try to decide what to do about them I sit down and daydream about where they're going: California. I would like to be going too, but that would only introduce more quietness at this point, and the confusion of multiple allegiances.

"I do not understand my personal history," I think, while I perch on the end of my bed like I have to while it's waiting for me to divide everyone I think I would like to send a card to into 4 distinct groups because of the 4 types of cards.

Í'm going to admit here that I know what the trouble is. I don't know my friends very well anymore.

bygone summer elation (a photo by Reanna of Zannie, Patrick, and me)

see< >saw

i whisper hello to everything