07.26.06 - 9:39 p.m.

Just like the philosopher on the radio said, all truth is mediated through stories. I told myself some in the blueberry fields today, while trying to still come to terms with never having a family, just two unhappy, blind, bent-out-of-shape adults living together in a big house too far from town. I hope that someday I'll stop suddenly getting blindsided by this bullshit over and over.

My Mom divorced my Dad when I was sixteen instead of two because she isn't a brave lady, and because she didn't want to disappoint her parents. Instead of a grand pooling-of-interests and resources and occupations that results in a house, scheduled dinner times, kids, and satisfaction for all, I think marriage these days is more an honest reflection of what it really takes to survive these modern times with grace. And that is....a partner in crime, an example of beauty, a trustworthy confidant, a sexy best friend...

I really hope to become half of an awesome 2 person family sometime.
A family is something I think I could use.

see< >saw

i whisper hello to everything